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Home » 60 Funniest and Most Profound Psych Quotes To Make You Laugh

60 Funniest and Most Profound Psych Quotes To Make You Laugh

Psych is a beloved American detective comedy-drama television series that aired on USA Network from 2006 to 2014. The show follows the adventures of Shawn Spencer, a highly observant man who pretends to be psychic in order to solve crimes with his best friend Burton “Gus” Guster. 

What makes Psych stand out from other detective shows is its lightheartedness and humor, which are woven into every episode. The chemistry between the two leads, James Roday Rodriguez as Shawn and Dulé Hill as Gus, is infectious and has won over fans worldwide. With its witty banter, pop culture references, and memorable guest stars, Psych remains a fan favorite years after its finale aired.

About Psych

Steve Franks created Psych, which is a comedy-drama TV show about detectives in America. The show premiered on July 7, 2006, and ran for eight seasons until its finale on March 26, 2014. Psych follows the adventures of Shawn Spencer (James Roday Rodriguez), a young crime consultant with a photographic memory, and his best friend Burton “Gus” Guster (Dulé Hill), who are hired by the Santa Barbara Police Department as consultants to help solve crimes.

The show has gained a massive cult following due to its clever writing, hilarious jokes, and pop culture references. One of the most significant aspects of Psych is that it never took itself too seriously; it always allowed viewers to sit back and laugh at the absurdity of it all while still delivering engaging mysteries in each episode.

Top Psych Quotes

It’s no surprise that Psych fans are always on the lookout for their favorite quotes from the show. With eight seasons and over 120 episodes, Psych has given us some of the most memorable quotes in television history. From Shawn Spencer’s snarky comments to Gus’ obscure references, this show is filled with one-liners that will make you laugh out loud. In this article, we’ll be taking a look at some of the top psych quotes from the series that have stood the test of time.

“My name is Shawn Spencer, this is my associate, Jazz Hands.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 4: He Dead
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“Note to self: be rich one day.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 4: He Dead
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“Well, the plot, unlike your hair, continues to thicken.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 6: Santabarbaratown
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“Man, I’m nobody’s charity case. I demand to dig my own grave!”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 7: No Country for Two Old Men
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“Just because you put syrup on something don’t make it pancakes.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 6: True Grits
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“Well, much like Lady Gaga, I was born this way.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 6: True Grits
“We take our hand-held entertainment very seriously.”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 6: Neil Simon’s Lover’s Retreat
“We’re so far off the grid I think we may be back on the grid.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 6: The Tao of Gus
“Everyone stop whatever you’re doing and only pay attention to me.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 6: The Amazing Psych-Man & Tap Man, Issue No. 2
“It’s a gift that I bust out on rare occasions and almost all the time.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 6: This Episode Sucks
“Okay, you guys are actually devolving.”
— Juliet O’Hara, Psych, Season 6: This Episode Sucks
“I can’t help it, Shawn, my body craves buttery goodness.”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 6: Last Night Gus
“I can’t help being a gorgeous fiend. It’s just the card I drew.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 6: This Episode Sucks
“Partners do not lie to each other, because partners put their lives in each other’s hands.”
— Carlton Lassiter, Psych, Season 6: Shawn Rescues Darth Vader
“Hello! I’m Shawn Spencer. This is my partner Radio Star. I’m afraid your video will kill him.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 5: Dead Bear Walking
“I’m the cream in a crying sandwich.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 5: Dead Bear Walking
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“Injury-free since June, when Gus broke his finger flipping the injury countdown calendar.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 5: We’d Like to Thank the Academy
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“What isn’t clear is why people always say ‘goes without saying,’ yet still feel compelled to say the thing that was supposed to go without saying. Doesn’t that bother you?”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: Disco Didn’t Die. It Was Murdered!
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“Sorry, I was too busy James Bonding it up in here.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 6: Shawn Rescues Darth Vader
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“I’m having a clear vision on a cloudy day.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 5: Viagra Falls
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“Take lots of pictures. Not of sights. Don’t take pictures of buildings. Take pictures of moments, because that’s what matters.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 5: One, Maybe Two, Ways Out
“The truth is, I want to change, I need to change.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 5: Chivalry Is Not Dead…But Someone Is
“Guster, you have to wake up to the real world: people have sex and kill each other. That’s the real world. Not some magical ‘feelings’ place.”
— Carlton Lassiter, Psych, Season 5: Feet Don’t Kill Me Now
“Gus wants to know if your boat has cable. It’s the season finale of Leverage and his TiVo’s on the fritz.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 4: The Head, The Tail, The Whole Damn Episode
“I still smell like stinky nuts!”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 4: Death Is In The Air
“I’m not big on nude handshakes.”
— Carlton Lassiter, Psych, Season 4: Death Is In The Air
“I don’t lose things. I place things in locations which later elude me.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 4: Shawn Gets the Yips
“I look up to Brett Favre, but that doesn’t mean I believe everything he says. Alright, that’s a bad example. It’s those tearful press conferences, man. They get me every time.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 4: The Devil Is in the Details… And the Upstairs Bedroom
“It’s just stupid, that’s all. I mean, if he didn’t have any hair then no one had any business calling him Fuzzy Wuzzy.””
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: Lassie Did a Bad, Bad Thing
“I can’t believe you actually thought that text was from me. It lacked all nuance, my signature mocking tone, and was utterly devoid of emoticons.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: Lassie Did a Bad, Bad Thing
“You wanna be hawk-eye or crow’s nest?”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: Six Feet Under the Sea
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“Ahoy, there! Um, yes. Right. Um, my name is Shawn Spencer. This is my first mate, Hummingbird Saltalamacchia.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: Six Feet Under the Sea
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“Great, dripping with swagger!”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: Gus Walks Into A Bank
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“ I have an idea, but we’ll need cool names.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: There Might Be Blood
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“I am nobody’s pawn, Shawn. I’m a Queen.”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 3: There Might Be Blood
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“It’s just that laws keep changing. It’s getting very challenging to keep up with them all. For example, did you know that it is now illegal to give a possum a perm?”
— Karen Vick, Psych, Season 3: The Greatest Adventure in the History of Basic Cable
“Mindy, it’s official: you’ve won bitchiest banana.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: Daredevils!
“This is the best shake on the planet. One part ice cream, two parts awesome!”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 3: The Greatest Adventure in the History of Basic Cable
“Great, now we got a mummy on the loose and the son of a bitch knows how to drive stick?”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 2: Shawn
“I’d rather shower with a bear.”
— Carlton Lassiter, Psych, Season 2: Black and Tan
“I’ve heard it both ways.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: Shawn
“Remember Dad, you treat a woman like a person, then a princess, then a Greek goddess, then a person again.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: Black and Tan
“My dad is a lying liar from Liarsburg!”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: Dis-Lodged
“Just call me the suck-stopper. No, wait. Don’t ever call me that.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: There’s Something About Mira
“My name is Shwan. This is my partner, Scoony ‘U-Turn’ Singleton”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: Gus’s Dad May Have Killed an Old Guy
“Where do I get a juice box and does it come in grapalicious.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: If You’re So Smart, Then Why Are You Dead?
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“I think your shirt and his shirt should get together and go bowling.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: And Down the Stretch Comes Murder
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“Doodles are the windows to the soul, Gus.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: 65 Million Years Off
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“Where’d you get that suit, the toilet store?”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 2: 65 Million Years Off
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“Shawn, I’ve been worried about you since you turned three and started eating your own toenails.”
— Henry Spencer, Psych, Season 2: 65 Million Years Off
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“How about you play six degrees of kiss my ass?”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 2: 65 Million Years Off
“I’m gonna crack her like a bad back!”
— Carlton Lassiter, Psych, Season 2: American Duos
“Hooray for loopholes!”
— Henry Spencer, Psych, Season 1: Poker? I Barely Know Her
“The chips say you’re a cheater, cheater pumpkin eater!”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 1: Poker? I Barely Know Her
“Why you dirty, filthy rascal with the suede, suede head.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 1: Poker? I Barely Know Her
“Clouds don’t kill people. People kill people.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 1: Cloudy… With a Chance of Murder
“What are you doing? We don’t know anything about delivering warthog babies.”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 1: Forget Me Not
“There is a witness. There’s a cat. I want to talk to that cat as soon as he’s done licking himself… wow, I’m jealous.”
— Shawn Spencer, Psych, Season 1: 9 Lives
“I just got a lap dance from Patrick Swayze!”
— Burton ‘Gus’ Guster, Psych, Season 1: Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Piece
“When I was in the department there were two things I hated in this world: private investigators and psychics. Congratulations, kid, you just hit the disappointment trifecta.”
— Henry Spencer, Psych, Season 1: Pilot

FAQs

What was Burton Guster’s famous quote?

I’m having nightmares, I can’t sleep.

What was Carlton Lassiter’s quote?

“I’m not big on nude handshakes.”

What is Naval’s famous quote?

“It’s easier to change yourself than to change the world.”

Let’s Wind Up…

Psych is a show that has captivated audiences for over a decade with its witty humor and impressive detective work. The dynamic duo of Shawn and Gus has captured our hearts, leaving us wanting more after each episode. The show’s success can be credited to the talented cast and crew who brought the characters to life on-screen.

As we say goodbye to this beloved series, we are left with fond memories of laughter and intrigue. It’s safe to say that Psych will always hold a special place in our hearts and minds. If you haven’t already, it’s time to join the Psych-Os and experience this remarkable show for yourself. Who knows?